as i'm growing older, i realized that being in a relationship isn't always about love and lust and happy things. i was so naive back then. took some time for me to understand that there are major differences between being in love and being in a relationship. being attached: it's about commitment, letting someone live into your boundaries and contribute in every decision you make in your life, to bear each other's vision, traits, lifestyle, perspective, and values. those things aren't always easy to be accepted. i was taught that the idea of being attached with someone is overrated; it's deliberating. people taught me how to avoid, refuse, or end a relationship; but nobody taught how to unlove and unfeel things.

I guess

the thing about you will always be forever a fantasy.

seems like it's just the only place to lead me having what i want.

you.

I got a whole zoo on my stomach when you crossed out my mind.

you brought such effects that undeniably hypnotizing.

also, addicting.

so addicting that i thought you were possibly categorized as narcotics.

yes, thinking of you was such an ecstacy. incredibly addicting. incredibly good.

i got goosebumps everytime you walk-passed by.

suddenly i could feel blood raced faster through my veins,

and all i did was trying so hard to not showing any awkward face or movements.

inside i was hoping of some miraculous tragedies, such unexpected accidents that somehow could bond us together.

so we could get to know each other.

or at least, you knew my name.

oh crap.

i fantasized too much.

to be honest, you're not so handsome.

you're.. manly.

call me a freak, but

i always pictured you as one of Greek's Gods.

cause, for God's sake, you were look like one.

oh also, you're artsy.

just like how Park thought about Eleanor,

that art wasn't always looked beautiful.

art supposed to make you feel something.

but you didn't make me just feel that way.

you made me feel everything.

crap.

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