we're all fugitives
look at the way we live
down here, I can't sleep from fear, no
I said, which way do I turn?
oh I forget everything I learn
and the spies came out of the water
but you're feeling so bad, cause you know
the spies hide out in every corner
but you can't touch them, no
cause they're all spies
hari ini gue hepi banget!
udah dua minggu ini cuaca bandung (baca: cimahi, hehe) bener-bener gloomy. mendung dari pagi sampe sore, nggak ada sinar matahari langsung, langitnya selalu abu-abu butek. i used to love this gloomy weather. tapi sebagai seseorang yang kadang menggantungkan productivity mood kepada cuaca di luar, gloomy weather is nottttt goood. bawannya bangun-bangun ingin ku menarik selimut dan rebahan lagi. pagi ini, begitu keluar rumah liat langit biru cerah & ada matahari, saat itu juga gue langsung keluarin sepeda dan gowes keliling kompleks. mood gue pagi ini langsung baguuus banget. dipikir-pikir, such simple things in life... cuma gara-gara cuaca, bisa ya bikin gue mendadak sebahagia ini. we really take some things in our lives for granted, don't we?
sepanjang sepedaan, gue bener-bener nikmatiiiin tiap kayuhan sepeda, liat sekeliling sambil dengerin playlist andalan gue. i've been constantly thinking about things, mostly: kuliah, skripsi, tugas, or being anxious about kuliah, skripsi dan tugas :))) but not this time.
sempat terbesit di pikiran gue; ini nggak sih yang orang-orang bilang mindful state of mind?
sejujurnya, gue belum begitu dalam menggali konsep mindfulness. tapi, yang pasti gue bener-bener ngerasa content dan 'sensing' all things around me. menaruh seluruh atensi gue ke apa yang ada di depan mata dan sekeliling gue. gak ke hp maupun laptop layaknya apa yang gue lakukan hampir sepanjang hari. pagi ini, gue memutuskan gue ingin living mindfully setiap hari! pengen live in the present. pengen menghargai setiap kegiatan yang gue lakuin dan hal-hal yang ada di sekitar. pengen belajar lagi tentang konsep mindful living. p.s: at the moment, gue sambil baca Modern Spirituality: A Guide to the Heart of Mindfulness, Meditation, and The Art of Healing.
pokoknya, hari ini gue ngerasa bahagia, damai dan content... dan iya. cuma gara-gara cuaca.
titik.
Elie Wiesel pernah bilang, "we must see in every person a universe with its own secrets, with its own treasures, with its own sources of anguish, and with some measure of triumph". i think it's such a wonderful metaphor, to see a person as a universe.
source: NASA |
the quote somewhat makes me realize that we tend to forget that all things appeared on social media embodied superficiality. someone is so much more than what they chose to be seen. one consists of a brain filled with ideas and perceptions, a heart that gives birth to emotion, years of past carrying memories and scars which incised traumas, and traces of their surroundings--family, friends, society, things which make people people. this thing called instagram suka bikin gue lupa bahwa apa yang gue tau tentang mereka dari instastory dan post tuh nggak membuat gue benar-benar mengenal mereka. atau ngga usah jauh jauh via instagram deh, gue pun mungkin belum benar-benar dig down inside satu persatu secara partikular orang-orang di sekitar gue as a whole person. gue baru belajar the beauty of treasuring someone as a universe dari kakak gue yang dengan segala keberaniannya, memutuskan untuk open up tentang masa lalu dan trauma yang dia alami. i used to wonder why kenapa dia orangnya kayak gini, kenapa cara dia me-manage emosinya kayak gitu, kenapa dia cenderung begini kalo melakukan ini, dan lain-lain sampai akhirnya gue diberi potongan masa lalunya. she took hell of a courage to give me a piece of puzzle of her life yang bikin gue ngerasa kayak ditampar sambil dibilangin "you think you knew a person so much? no babe, you knew nothing at all" #drama. hehe. tapi sejak hari itu, sesungguhnya gue gak bisa memandang dia dengan cara yang sama.
ketika gue tau apa alasan dibalik semua itu, gue jadi bisa lebih memahami bagaimana rasanya berada di posisi dia, apa yang melatarbelakangi dia make such decisions, act in such ways, dan lain-lain. on a note, memang gue nggak bisa expect semua orang untuk open up dan memberikan pengertian. for some, membuka diri bisa jadi membuka luka lama. bisa jadi itu adalah sesuatu yang mereka tutup rapat juga.. karena memang nggak semua orang worth to be shared with such personal, if not deepest, informations. pun mereka juga sebenarnya nggak berkewajiban untuk memberi pengertian ke semua orang, berkoar-koar tentang apa yang mereka alami dalam hidupnya. jadi ya... mengalir aja? buat gue, ini jadi life lesson sih. semacam diingetin untuk jadi orang yang berpengertian... jauh-jauh dari prasangka buruk dan suudzon. diingetin lagi supaya bisa pendengar yang baik. tiap kali diberi kesempatan oleh orang lain untuk diceritain, gue juga jadi lebih menghargai itu. karena nggak semua orang bisa dikasih kepercayaan untuk jadi pendengar cerita mereka. kita pun picky kan untuk menceritakan beberapa hal tertentu? things that mean so much to us, tentunya kita pun hanya membagi itu ke orang yang kita percaya dan worth untuk tahu. nggak untuk yang sekedar pengen tau karena kepo doang. bercerita bisa jadi adalah hal yang sangaaatttt berarti. i guess the point is; every living person carries their own baggage. each of us comes in a package of all the good and the bad things in the past which makes us who we are. have some virtue to tolerate each flaws. be a good listener. and the most important out all of it: be a good humankind.
table for two: for you and the unfinished business
"Puji Tuhan, Neng. Semoga diberkati selalu. Puji Tuhan, Puji Tuhan... Hati-hati di jalan ya Neng."
Suara mbaknya sampe bergetar. Nangis banget gue. Ditambah lanjut nyetir sendiri di mobil malem-malem, vibes sedihnya ngedukung pol. Kadang, buat gue duit dua puluh ribu hanya sekecil uang buat beli kopi. Malah di beberapa tempat, kopi aja bisa dua-tiga kali lipatnya. Tapi gue suka nggak sadar uang kopi gue bisa segitu berartinya buat orang lain yang mo makan aja mikir dua kali.. gila, langsung berasa egois dan songong banget gue! I don't have a job yet, i'm still financially depending on my parents, i have the luxury untuk gak mikir 2x buat beli makan dan milih mo makan apa, dan baru sadar kok kayaknya frekuensi gue memberi ke orang lain tuh ga sesering gue purchase an overpriced coffee di sbux. Gue kayak disadarkan lagi kalo things we do really matter to other people, the joy of giving to other people is just real.. dan sangat, sangat fulfilling
you thought you knew a person so much until you realized; you knew nothing at all.
hari anak nasional somehow selalu bikin gue sedih dan mellow. gue selalu berangan-angan bisa merayakan hari anak dengan sesuatu yang membuat gue bahagia. mengenang lagu anak-anak yang gue suka jaman kecil: cinta untuk mama, album-album sherina dan tasya. film anak-anak yang gue tonton jaman kecil: petualangan sherina, joshua oh joshua, children of heaven. reminisce memori gue di masa kecil, temen-temen gue dulu, cerita lucu pas kecil. instead, yang dibrought up tiap tanggal 23 juli adalah data kekerasan pada anak atau landmark cases kayak kasus pilu yang mengorbankan arie hanggara. bukannya gue ignorant dan berusaha menutup mata akan realita (because that's how it really is), tapi gue pengen sekaliii aja merayakan hari anak nasional dengan bahagia, tanpa diasosiasikan dengan hal yang bikin gue pilu dan sedih. dari tahun ke tahun kok ya tiap hari anak bawaan gue ngumpat "some people just don't deserve kids" doang
everything seems kinda blurry right now
selama quarantine ini, gue perhatiin orang-orang jadi punya hobi baru. kalo lo selama di rumah aja ngapain sih? yang paling sering gue lihat dari instagram sih, orang-orang mendadak hobi olahraga (paling sering sih gue liat ngikutin challengenya chloe ting), berkebun, sama masak. hmmm.. di antara tiga itu, gue latah cobain semuanya :)))) hoho
berkebun? check! gue udah panen stroberi, sawi, kangkung, trus sekarang lagi nunggu timun ama tomat berbuah. anyway, gue ngerasa sawi dan kangkung dari kebun gue (yang sebenernya balkon sih bukan kebun), jauh lebih fresh dan enak ketimbang beli di mang sayur. sumpah, rasanya beda banget! tiap gue bantu mama nyiram tanaman dan merhatiin progres tiap-tiap tanaman, rasanya sayaaang banget. selalu mikir kayak, "wow, kamu tuh beneran makhluk hidup ya." hehe
olahraga? check! gue aja masih menganggap gue tertarik olahraga tuh sebuah mukjizat. i've never been sporty, apalagi sejak masuk SMA yang santai banget lari aja bisa cule, sembunyi di semak-semak deket UKS sampe kabur ke kantin. gue cukup tertampar sih waktu dokter gue bilang nyeri dada yang lumayan sering gue alamin tiba-tiba (dan bikin parno) tuh major reasonnya karena gue jarang olahraga. as soon as the exam was over, gue langsung beli yoga mat dan mulai workout program. hmmm mari kita lihat sampe kapan gue akan konsisten olahraga :-) (((padahal sore ini aja skip))))
masak? check! orang-orang sekitar gue pasti tau banget kalo gue sukaaa banget makan (enak) dan demen banget ngomentarin makanan. akhirnya, selama quarantine (dan gabut post-UAS) ini, gue juga memulai karir baru di dunia kuliner selain jadi tukang kritik, yakni mulai bereksperimen juga dalam masak-memasak. ternyata beli bahan makanan sendiri, masak sarapan-makan siang-makan malem sendiri, sampe coba bikin kue sendiri tuh asik dan memberi efek terapeutik bagi gue.
karena gue songong dan overproud dan ini platform gue, gue mau share mahakarya-mahakarya tangan emas gue dalam dunia kuliner selama quarantine.
Earl Grey Yogurt Cake
ngapain lagi ya enaknya?
if you could have it the other way, where would you be and what would you do at the moment?
but your death; they won't happen to you.
it happens to your family and your friends.those verses couldn't be more accurate
i've been missing you so much
p.s: i'm sorry i've been so mellow these days
it took a big leap of faith to let yourself love and be loved. the way i figured it out, love isn't always easy to feel. it's frightening and it's scary. sometimes it turns me to be insecure. it makes me lose my authority over my own emotions. it's a breeding ground for my anxious thoughts and feelings; in a way that it consumes me. it forms a constant battle on my own mind. i wanna run away. i want to keep close. you know he doesn't see you that way. but what if he does? you can't afford to be with someone. maybe i can. you're wasting your time. maybe it takes time. you're being irrational. nothing about love is rational. i don't want to. i don't want to either, but..
there's a certain je ne sais quoi in every verse of this song
the song itself is just effortlessly beautiful, soulful & makes me emotional in a way that it hurts me.. but also makes me feel warm
i have a few interpretations of the lyrics, yet i still have no clue how should i really feel about it... or perhaps some things are just not meant to be figured out
di satu sisi, kangen banget sama rutinitas sehari-hari gue sebelum situasi quarantine ini. pengen banget cepet berakhir. as this situation brings so much uncertainty in my life & my future, especially during this last year of college.. tapi di satu sisi lain, gue ngerasa 'nggak siap' juga ngehadapin gimana caranya adaptasi dan bounce back ke kehidupan nyata.
:-(
i once had a memorable conversation with a gojek driver on my firsts day of college. knowing i was a freshman, he asked me a such a heavy question to answer (at least for me).
i don't wanna forget some particular moments worth writing in my life; moments I would recite to my kids someday in the future.
gue sedih menerima fakta kalo gue sekarang sangatlah illiterate. ga kayak dulu, sekarang gue ngerasa sulit banget untuk nulis sesuatu, even the smallest random things. kalo liat archived gue dari jaman 2010, hal gak penting sekalipun kayaknya bisa lancar aja gue tulis. kemampuan baca gue jauh berdegradasi. books used to be the things i easily consumed back then, novel bisa beberapa jam kelar gue baca. now... i haven't even finished my Aristotle & Dante Discover the Secret of the Universe i bought last year. so... pardon my writing, will you?
anyway, it's been 2 weeks since i've had my classes from home due to this pandemic virus.
this covid-19 pandemic situation sucks, indeed. perkuliahan jarak jauh bikin situasi kadang jauh lebih capek dibanding kelas biasanya. tugas gue jadi lebih banyak, ujian lebih kecot dan traumatis, kelas online yang ga kondusif (beberapa mata kuliah gue bahkan semacam abandoned oleh dosen), bikin mata gue pusing juga most of time of the day mantengin laptop. ah, not to mention prapid & prapid just got cancelled. sedih banget gaada memori mooting di semester 6. meskipun dulu (waktu kuliah tatap muka) capek tiap hari pulang malem gara-gara latihan prapid praper, jujur gue enjoy banget jalaninnya. nggak cuma dari segi akademis, gue juga dibikin parno tiap hari karena situasi ini. selalu ngerasa kotor lah, pusing dikit parno, batuk dikit degdegan.
things have changed a lot.
but it wasn't all bad though, if we try to look the other way.
situasi class from home bikin gue ga harus catokan tiap hari. nor wearing any make ups.
things have changed too in my family.
to be frank, i couldn't recall when was the last time my family gathers on weekdays. ada di rumah bareng mba ajeng, mba yaya, dan papa sehari-hari di rumah somehow feels a lil bit strange... yet it feels so warm. like those good ol days; childhood days. udah lama ga ngalamin berantem rebutan ayam mana yang lebih besar atau paling banyak kulitnya, nyusun plan snack apa yang kita buka hari ini-besok-lusa, rebutan siapa yang tidur sama boba, saling nungguin biar bisa makan siang bareng, kumpul deketan dan ngobrol di ruang tv meskipun kadang masing-masing juga concern sama buku/gadget/aktivitas masing-masing. well, i must say being able to be home with my family is the most luxurious thing i obtained from this covid-19 situation.
falling in love in 20s is no longer as fun as it was in my teenage years. those butterflies used to be so... beautifully exhilarating, dramatic, and compelling in a powerfully irresistible way. now it gives me anxiety, fear, and perplexity. nonetheless, the sparks still exist. safe to say that it's been a long time since the last time I've gotten the thought of somebody stuck in my head. part of me is consistently saying "do. not. fall" but there's always something keeping me drawn. and i don't like it. or maybe i do. well i don't want it. or maybe, i do.
It's 2020 already. Happy new year! :)
2019 was quite a hell of a year. No pain, no gain, they said. That quote kinda applied on me. It makes me relieved that i gained something this year, not only felt the pain. Lol. Meskipun sebenernya selalu ada sesuatu yang bisa diambil dari setiap hal; mau itu baik atau buruk. It's all about perspective anyway.
Tahun 2019 bisa dibilang merupakan tahun yang berarti banget bagi perkembangan diri gue. A lot of things happened this year. Here are some worth being mentioned.
The birth of Z
Gue akhirnya punya keponakan! :') gosh. I knew, i knew that i would love him! Even before he was born. Gue masih ingat betul momen di rumah sakit di mana Zafran, keponakan gue, dibawa pakai kereta bayi sama suster. My heart dropped seeing his sleeping angelic face that time. Clearly, I fell deeply in love with him at first sight. Not only I see him as my nephew, I see and I love him as if he's my own son. Dengan sekejap dia jadi pusat tata surya keluarga gue. His existence lights up the house. He simply changed not only my sister's life, but mine too. Hadirnya keponakan pertama juga bikin gue turut belajar tentang parenthood and its struggles.
Pers
Awal tahun 2019 kemarin, gue dengan Aji dan Dida bareng-bareng maju jadi BPH Pers Perfilma. Safe to say that it was one of my best decision of the year. Gue nggak pernah ada niatan maju sampe akhirnya Aji & Dida approach gue. Tahu mereka bakal jadi partner BPH gue, gue nggak mikir begitu panjang. Karena pers juga, gue ketemu sama 13 staf-staf gue yang gue sayaaaang banget. Fai, Nivel, Raka, Cilla, Mey, Vito, Randhika, Muthy, Ica, Afa, Clara, Tiku, dan Sheila. Masing-masing punya karakter yang unik. Gue seneng banget karena pers, gue punya circle dan temen-temen baru yang bikin gue nyaman banget. Never a dull moment with them. Bahkan rapat pun rasanya selalu menyenangkan. Nggak kerasa udah setahun kepengurusan aja. Banyak banget hal yang bisa gue pelajarin dari pers tahun ini. Mulai dari dealing with people with different characteristic, controlling things, bikin suasana kerja yang nyaman bagi staf-staf, belajar gimana jadi temen dan partner kerja yan seharusnya, bagi waktu, dan hal lainnya. I'm glad that we all met and grew together as individuals. Bisa dibilang, mereka adalah salah satu highlight kehidupan kuliah gue.
Taking a rest
Hal terpenting yang gue pelajarin tahun ini adalah istirahat. Sebelumnya, gue nggak ngeh seberapa pentingnya 'istirahat' dari kesibukan sampai pertengahan tahun 2019. Semester 4 somehow kerasa berat banget bagi gue. I went through several emotional breakdowns. I felt tired, I felt exhausted. Beban akademik dan peer pressure tuh nyata adanya di semester 4, ditambah lagi gue sempet ngerasa ngadepin semua itu sendirian, ngerasa lingkungan sekitar gue nggak supportive. I thank God for being 'rescued' by some people. Beberapa orang ini juga yang menyadarkan gue kalo genuine friendship itu eksis dan berhasil membuat gue yakin kalo gue nggak sendirian ngejalanin hidup ini. Having a genuine friendship is indeed is such a beautiful and rare thing. Kembali ke topik. Di saat temen-temen gue memutuskan buat magang di waktu 3 bulan kemarin, gue memutuskan buat taking a rest dan bener-bener pakai waktu tersebut dengan having fun. Do things i haven't tried before. Sangat susah buat nggak ngerasa fear of missing out; seeing my friends are experiencing something new. In this competitive surrounding and the fast-paced life of the capital city, sometimes taking a rest feels like a sin. Apalagi kalo liat kanan-kiri orang-orang pada kerja kerja kerja dan achieving things. Then I listened to what I actually really need. Gue yakin banget bahwa gue bener-bener butuh istirahat dan recharge diri gue. Please mind that there's a difference between taking a rest dan gabut ya. I've been spending most of my days with something related to college and organization throughout my 2 years of college, bahkan saat liburan semester. So what i did during 3 months of semester break? Gue road trip ke Jawa. I went YOLO and colored my hair into pink, blue and ash. Gue gardening bareng mama. Gue ketemu Sulthan dan menghabiskan waktu jalan-jalan, exploring museums, kulineran. Gue belajar main waveboard! Gue baca banyak buku baru. Gue sempet ngelukis lagi (tapi sayangnya ga selesai karena oil-nya abis dan males beli keluar wakaka). I recharged myself and somehow I felt more alive. I'm glad I did. masuk semester 5, gue bener-bener ngerasa recharged dan semangat ngejalanin perkuliahan, lebih fokus, lebih antusias, dan performance gue jauh lebih baik. Don't get me wrong, this semester was academically hard too, tapi gue ngerasa 'siap' dan mampu jalanin tanpa banyak mengeluh lol. I was in a much better mental and emotional state. Sooo i guess one of the things that 2019 taught me was: you need to listen to yourself and your body, know what you need, dan value konsep 'istirahat' itu sendiri.
Getting out of my comfort zone
Daftar jadi delegasi sebuah event dimana gue ga kenal siapa-siapa dan gaada temen yang sama-sama ikutan nggak bisa dipungkiri bikin gue degdegan. Tapi yaudahlah. Saat-saat kayak gini mengingatkan gue betapa pentingnya buat mandiri dan berani ngelakuin hal baru sendirian. Indeed, we need to get comfortable with going to places and doing things by ourselves so we don't miss out on life waiting on people. Kalo nggak, ya ga bakal bisa maju. Meeting new bunch of people have always been challenging (i'm an INTJ, remember?). Anxious buat instantly mingle with other people who sometimes already knew each other. Tapiii seneng banget karena i went through those things quite smoothly. Gue justru ketemu temen-temen baru dari univ lain, we kept in touch, cobain simulasi mediasi dan nyusun strategi negosiasi, belajar banyak tentang tema yang dibawain. Such a whole new thing. Di akhir tahun, gue soide lagi nyobain bikin legal memorandum buat call for paper. Lagi-lagi sendiri, di saat kebanyakan partisipan lainnya teamed up. Turned out i got the second best. Pas banget di saat gue ngerasa butuh validasi if i'm ever worthy to study in law school. Ini bukan apa-apa sih, bukan sesuatu yang besar juga, tapi cukup berarti mendorong kepercayaan diri gue & yakinin gue kalo gue bisa kok achieve things dengan kerja keras.
It's not about what i've achieved or what i've done in 2019. It was the progress that amazed me. Gue ngerasa gue jauh lebih mengenal dan lebih value diri gue sendiri, including the vulnerable part of myself di tahun ini. Gue juga bersyukur dipertemukan orang-orang yang kayaknya-tanpa-mereka-gue-bisa-gila dan membuat gue sangat value the concept of friendship. Gue ngerasa gue udah bisa mengakhiri 2019 dengan damai dengan mental and emotional state yang stabil. I'm glad for everything that happened in 2019. Indeed it was quite a hell of a year, but I'm thankful that it made me progress a lot.
To 2020 and many more great, unexpected, valuable things to happen; I can't see what this year would taught and made me become. CHEERS!